These past few weeks have been really rough. Tears have been my constant companion and I do everything I can to avoid the wrestling within my head and my heart. I can’t begin to explain the weight of transitions that are happening in my life. Between starting a new job, moving homes, ending relationships, and physical attacks on my family I am drained. It has been a long time since I have been this emotionally, physically, and spiritually exhausted. Today I just wanted to lie down in my bed and sleep until the storms of life have passed. It’s not often that I literally want to check out, but I can say that I was there today and in many ways am still there. I know there is a lot I need to process, but I can’t seem to know where to begin. I am angry, sad, grieving, and just down right tired of members of my family being sick or injured. When this year began I felt like good things were coming – I pray this is the storm before the calm because to put it bluntly I haven’t seen that happen. At the end of June a friend of mine was praying for me and stated that he saw a boat anchored in the ocean. The ocean waves were fierce and the boat was being thrown to and fro pretty roughly. He said that my anchor was the Lord and no matter how bad the waves got to trust in that anchor. As reassuring as that should be right now I just need the waves to stop.
Music I Love
One of the things I have always loved is listening to music. Looking back on different time periods of my life not only could I share the story with you, but the exact song or album that describes that moment. I think part of my love for music comes from my mom. Growing up we always had music on in the house when my mom was home. To this day if you come over and she is washing the dishes or laying out by the pool - the radio will be playing. This goes for me as well. Whether I am driving, working out, getting reading in the morning, or just hanging around the house I usually have music on. One of my favorite artists for a couple years now has been Adele. I know that with her single "Rolling in the Deep" many people jumped on the "I heart Adele" bandwagon, but I have loved her since her first album 19. I love that she is honest both in her songwriting and in her singing. This is my most recent favorite that she did at the Itunes London Festival. It is a cover of Bonnie Raitt's hit "I Can't Make You Love Me." This cover is stunning and brings a flood of emotion. I am crossing my fingers that she sings this when I see her perform at the Ryman in October.
The Lord is our Keeper
1 I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? 2 My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. 3 He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. 4 Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. 5 The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand. 6 The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night. 7 The Lord will keep you from all evil; he will keep your life. 8 The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in from this time forth and forevermore.
I have recently started studying the Psalms of Ascent (120-134) which are the songs the travelers sang during the pilgrimage to Jerusalem and also as worship in the temple once they had arrived. The other night I was reading Psalm 121 and the line "The Lord is your keeper" stuck out to me. I realized I didn't really understand what the work keeper meant. I read through a couple different translations and found that the words protect or help are also used. I was urged to pursue further and loved what I found in Strong's Concordance. The Hebrew word for keeper that is used in Psalm 121 is shamar. As I looked up what shamar translates to, I also looked up the definition of the word in the English dictionary. The depth of the word keeper and the translation of the "Lord is your keeper" is astounding. This is a statement that truly characterizes the Lord and his affection for us.
Shamar translates as:
- properly to hedge about as with thorns (guard)
- generally to protect
- to attend to (to look after, to be present with)
- beware (to take care of)
- be circumspect (careful to consider all circumstance and possible consequences)
- take heed (to pay attention)
- keep (to be faithful to, to watch over and defend)
- mark (to take notice of, designate, distinguish)
- look narrowly
- observe (to come to realize or know especially through consideration of noted facts)
- preserve (to keep safe from injury, harm, or destruction)
- regard (a feeling of respect and affection, a protective interest)
- reserve (to set aside or apart)
- save (to rescue or deliver from harm)
- sure (safe from danger or harm)
- wait for (to stay in a place of expectation)
- watch/watchman (to be awake during the night, to guard, to be attentive)
My prayer for you and for me is that we understand and believe that the Lord is our keeper. And that in being our keeper He fulfills every piece of every part of the definition of shamar.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)